M.A. Grant's Top Books of 2016

Despite the struggles of 2016, my "favorites" bookshelf grew a lot heavier. For a number of reasons, this year became a breather for me, a chance to recharge. Most of that came through reading. The books listed below may not have a lot of detail in my reviews/descriptions, but I can assure you that all of these have left a huge impression on me.

The Soldier's Scoundrel by Cat Sebastian - The book is addictive and a perfect historical. The audiobook is even better. I've listened to it at least five times and go back to it over and over.

The Captive Prince trilogy by C.S. Pacat - The series (Captive Prince, Prince's Gambit, Kings Rising) engrossed me completely. I couldn't read them fast enough. I couldn't reread them enough. They're going to be classics of the fantasy genre. Full stop.

Wolfsong by TJ Klune - For the record, pretty much every book I've read by TJ Klune is amazeballs. His BOATK series made me cry multiple times, which rarely happens. But Wolfsong is something else. It's one of the best shifter stories I've ever read. And again, the audiobook is damn good too.

Carry On by Rainbow Rowell - This book was probably the single most important text I read all year. It prompted me to return to writing with a story that I'd never thought myself brave enough to write; that same story is what landed me an agent, a new group of fans and friends, and reminded me why I started writing in the first place. This is one of the most beautiful fantasy novels ever and its audiobook is magical.

For Real by Alexis Hall - There's a reason this book won the RITA. Full disclosure, it's erotica, but unlike any erotica book I've ever read before. The whole point is that those heated sexual moments drive the character and plot arcs; this is one of the rawest, most emotional books I read this year and I finally gave in to get the audiobook and have been very impressed with the dueling narration and how right it sounds.

Selling Your Story in 60 Seconds: The Guaranteed Way to Get Your Screenplay or Novel Read by Michael Hauge - Hauge's a legend in his own right and when I was nervous about going to the RWA conference and pitching my story, I decided to throw in and see if his methods could help me. They apparently did since I used his techniques during the Twitter pitch that helped me catch the attention of Deidre Knight, who now represents me. Novelists and screenwriters will likely get different things from this book, but it offers quick, understandable advice about how to make your work shine when pitching.


Obviously, there were tons of other books I've read that could have easily made this list, but I wanted to keep it short and simple. Since I've kept returning to these, I'll proudly announce them as my top books of 2016. Now to see what 2017 brings!

RWA 2014 Debriefing

Okay, if you’re looking for a short blog post, skip this one. I’m still reeling from the RWA Conference, but I promise it’s in the best way possible. Every second of sensory overload was worth it. I will also warn that my use of adjectives is—at best—repetitive and—at worse—something worse.

Day 1...The Travel

I left for the conference from Sacramento, California. On the plane I met several people who were also going to the conference, including Mary Tate Engels, who graciously allowed me to pick her brain about what to do with a backlist and how to approach the conference. She and I hung out together as we collected our luggage and were going to take the airport shuttle to the hotels.

Another woman was standing near the ticket booth and since the man running it had stepped out, the three of us got into a conversation. The newest lady asked if we all wanted to share a taxi to get there (cheaper and much nicer than taking an hour on a loop of the major hotels). Since we were about to become taxi buddies, we introduced ourselves. Turned out that nice woman was Brenda Novak.

Cue fangirl moment #1.

We all hopped into a taxi and discussed a ton of stuff in our ten minute taxi ride. Brenda discussed more about the industry (I now will be looking up ACX) and mentioned that one of her newest book series is set in Alaska and she might have to pick my brain.

Cue me handing over my business card with a personalized note about emailing me for Alaska info while praying that she wouldn’t notice how rabidly excited I had become to be of use.

I reached my hotel. I updated my family and husband that I was indeed alive and in San Antonio and that yes, it was much hotter than I was prepared for. I got my room. I showered. (You probably didn’t need to know that, but trust me, after hours on a plane, it was definitely one of those treats I couldn’t deny myself.) Then I headed across the street to go find two of my Harlequin forum buddies who were at the first-timers session (I got in too late to make it).

Stepping into the lobby of the Marriot stunned me. Literally. I stopped in my tracks and I’m sure all of the wonderful people milling about in the lobby probably thought, “Huh. Why does she look like a deer in the headlights and stop in the middle of the sliding glass door? Doesn’t she know it will try to close on her?”

Noise. And bodies. And happy squeals of greetings that I have now come to adore because it is one of the purest, most joyful sounds here. Oh, and a line for Starbucks that was at least 40 people deep.

I wandered upstairs, managed to check in and get a bag of loot, and started to get myself to rights. While waiting for the session to get out I was able to purchase my audio recordings of the full conference sessions (totally going to be my driving to work audiobook for a while). I stopped at the goody room and got more loot. Then I stood somewhere that I figured would be obvious and waited.

The session ended and out comes a flood of people. Again, overwhelming. Then I hear the squeal and find Carol and Cheryl (a.k.a. carolopal and CASpeakman from the boards). Cue hugging, gushing, and true wonder at meeting them in the flesh. I was starving and hadn’t eaten anything but a Rice Krispie treat lovingly made by my mother since 3:30 a.m., so Cheryl (who lives in San Antonio) took us to Dough. The food was incredible and it makes sense why it was featured on Food Network. She also brought macarons from Bakery Lorraine. We ate and talked and talked and talked and finally headed back to the hotels.

I unpacked. I ironed my clothes. I scheduled out my days. And I crashed hard.

Day 2…Let it begin…

Met C & C in the lobby for breakfast at 7:30 a.m. after getting a tea from the Starbucks. At this time, it was early enough to get in line and not wait a long time. By the way, the ladies working there are ah-mazing and fast and polite and should be tipped in gold bouillon. Just saying.

First session was “Bang! You’re Dead: Guns for Writers.” I’m a nerd and take tons of notes at conferences. 9 pages later the session ended. I thanked the presenter (Antoine de l’Espérance of Captive Unicorn Publications) and headed to session 2.

“Conquering High Concept” was equally fabulous. May Chen of Avon Books and authors Sarah MacLean and Sophie Jordan were leading the discussion. It was interactive, totally packed until people were spilling out the doors, and I took 6 pages of notes. There were a lot of gems of wisdom in this one. Here are my favorites:

• “As a writer, you need to find the crazy and go for it.” - Sophie Jordan (supported enthusiastically by May Chen)
• “Never write from a place of fear.” -Sarah MacLean
• “You’re always searching for the impossibility…and how can it work out?” -Sophie Jordan
• “Here’s how I describe the plot of a romance novel: shit happens when two idiots fall in love.” -Sarah MacLean
• “As a writer, at three-quarters of the way [in your book] you should be asking, ‘How will they ever be together?’ and you have to trust yourself to answer that.” -Sarah MacLean

The session was inspiring and energizing. It made me want to go and write. Later that day I got a chance to thank Sarah for the presentation. She was so kind and generous and I suffered from major fangirl moment #2.

I took a break, sat in the lounge and worked on my pitch a bit. While there I met Anne Eliot (YA writer) and she worked with me on the pitch for a while. Again, totally friendly and kind person. And we’d met in the Starbucks line, so we got to talk for quite a while.

Cue lunch. Keynote speaker Sylvia Day. More bags of loot waiting for me.

I have to take a second to gush. Sylvia Day’s keynote speech was one of the most inspiring I’d heard. She covered everything, from industry to craft to personal joy. But it was the end of her speech that teared me up. She said something I really needed to hear.

Let me go off on a side tangent for a second. I’m not a best-seller. I just want to write good books and have people enjoy them. Sometimes in this industry, people tell you that that’s not enough. You have to make it big. You have to have thousands of followers. You have to be a best-seller. You have to tweet/blog/sell your soul at least twenty times a day to get more engagement. (I must pause to give a huge shout out of ridiculous gratitude for Kate Cuthbert at Escape Publishing for taking that risk on me…I’ve been pimping Escape as much as I can here because I really feel like I’ve made a dream connection on my first shot in the dark). 

Okay, now for the bitter truth.

Despite realizing my dream of having my books published, I have felt so inferior so often because I thought it was wrong that I just wanted to write more good stories while saying, “Screw the rest of it.”

Sylvia Day’s keynote was perfect because she said this:

“The only person who can make you real, make your books real, is you.”

Le tweet

I tweeted this quote because it so elegantly encapsulated the issue I’ve been struggling with. And more than that, it validated that it was okay for me to write just because I love it.

By the way, this incredible lady actually responded to that tweet. I favorited it. And I squealed. And I fangirled yet again. Dude, lots of that going on here. More came when, on Day 3 I discovered she had retweeted my quote and bunch of other people liked it. Holy cow.

Getting ahead of myself though…

Another great piece of advice she gave during her speech was, “You must ask yourself, ‘Am I afraid? Am I making the decision because I’m scared?’ Then throw the fear away…We are only the best writer we can be at this time. We can only get better.”

I walked out of that lunch feeling lighter and more inspired than I have since I got my first acceptance letter.

But that’s what this conference does. If you have great CP partners like I do, it’s like throwing two thousand of them together and releasing them on the world. (Love you Kari and JM! Someday we will meet and storm the romance barricade together!) This conference surrounds you with people who understand what you’re trying to do. They don’t look at you funny when you talk about your characters as real people, because everyone here feels the same way. You do not have to hide yourself here. It’s a miracle. It’s freeing.

I spent more time relaxing in the lounge and working on my pitch. I talked to more people and had a great conversation about Anne Lamott’s Bird By Bird with Diane Hester.

I sojourned upstairs for “The Secret to Powerful Writing: Activate, Activate, Activate,” led by Claire Cavanaugh and Robin Perini. I know I’m running out of adjectives, so forgive me. It was nitty and gritty and again left me chomping at the bit to get writing. I wrote out the opening scene of The Wastes #2 there. Then Robin was even nice enough to answer one of my specific questions after the session and helped me tweak the scene to do what I needed it to. GAH! FANGIRL!!!!

Carol and me visiting with Travis

Off to the “Celebrating Authors” Reception. 

Lots of cowboys. Lots of food and fun and more people to meet. Pictures and interviews that might go up on Kindle Love Stories. Laughter. Blushing. Super cool.

Quick dinner at Denny’s for me since I seriously needed some downtime and was hungry again. I get hungry a lot when I travel…Anyway, my waitresses there were super friendly and very Texan and I adored them, especially when they confirmed that they did have my favorite soda, Dr. Pepper. Yeah, good people these Texans.

Back to the hotel for the Harlequin forums PJ party. I met tons of people who I had only known by their online handle. I met Shirley Hailstock (fangirling again) and she shared hilarious stories and beautiful wisdom and made our table snort tea. “Queen Elizabeth was gay.” If you’re laughing, you understand this inside joke and remember how we snorted our tea all over our red velvet cupcakes. If you’re not laughing, you had to be there. Sorry.

Back to the hotel. Shower. Promise to work on pitch. Exhaustion. Sleep.

Day 3 dawns

Wake up at 6 a.m. after a series of weird dreams involving the sensation of losing my grip on a whirling metal object and flying off into a void…Is there some kind of message there I’m missing? I once again practiced curling my wild, frizzy, untamable-in-Texas-humidity hair with my flat iron (my little sister is so proud I’ve finally learned to do this!) and headed across the street where we had a buffet breakfast and presentation by Cindy Ratzlaff. I left early to get in line for the Harlequin book signing.

Totally worth it.

Here’s the thing about the authors here. They’re kind. They’re personable. They ask you questions and really are genuinely interested in your response. I collected far too many books to take home because there was no way I couldn’t stop by to gush over their work or learn about a new book or series. I’ve given up counting my fangirl moments because there are too many.

Okay, that’s a lie. One more.

I came out of the Harlequin book signing and who is standing there but Jackie Ashenden. I preorder her books religiously. If I could have a writer spirit animal, it would be her because her heroes are dark and angsty and so real it hurts to read their stories. I love them and she’s an inspiration.

After some awkward pseudo-stalking (she was so gracious and didn’t act at all creeped out by my waiting to talk to her), we had a conversation. And, unbidden, I became so emotional and so embarrassed about being emotional because I had to thank her for writing those kind of heroes. Her kindness encouraged me to ask the question I’ve been trying to find an answer to.

Here’s the deal. I’ve been told by some people (not my editors, not my trusted CPs, but others who shall remain nameless) that my heroes are too dark, they’re too broken, and that they can’t work in romance. People don’t want them.

I asked Jackie if that was true.

She made a face somewhere between amusement and disbelief, shook her head, and promised me with complete conviction that it’s not true. That we need to be completely honest to our characters. If they’re dark, let them run with it because an editor can always tone it down, but we can’t amp that part of them up. That if we give in to those voices, we aren’t being true to ourselves as writers and then what’s the point?

I believe that God doesn’t let anything happen by accident. The timing of meeting her was too perfect, her advice too poignant, and her willingness to talk to a crazy fangirl too sweet and genuine for me to ever believe that coincidence alone led me to be given that advice by one of my favorite authors. When we doubt, signs are given that we need to trust that truest spark of ourselves and breathe it back into an inferno.

I apologized for fangirling and headed to the Avon signing where…MORE BOOKS!!! MORE AUTHORS!!! MORE FANGIRLING!!!

Are you noticing a pattern yet?

Had lunch with Carol and Cheryl, discussed our pitches, and then Cheryl and I headed across the street early for our pitching appointments.

This was my least favorite part of the day. Not because of my pitch. It was incredible to meet with the agent I had an appointment with; she was professional, answered my questions fully, and didn’t remind me of how nervous I was to sit across from her and pitch a story that’s dear to my heart. No matter how my submission to her goes, I feel honored that I made it that far and appreciate the time she gave to me.

The volunteers organizing the pitch sessions were amazing. So organized and efficient and funny and making what could have easily been a dire situation involving palm sweat and nerve-induced vomiting into a peaceful experience.

Several of the fellow writers I met during this sessions were a joy to sit beside. They were passionate and dedicated.

However, as with any meat market situation, there was an element of cattiness in some of the other women waiting in the room. I realize that I was in an unusual position. I love Escape and didn’t feel the need to pitch to another publisher at this point in my career, so I only signed up for an agent appointment. However, when appointments weren’t filled, the opportunity would arise for women to jump into that open slot.

This is when I heard whispered conversations about how unfair it was that some writers jumped over others for this opportunity. The potential for tearing each other down was too great for some of the people in the room and they seemed to enjoy complaining about the situation.

Don’t get me wrong, this didn’t ruin the conference or the pitching event for me. If anything, it reminded me that even in such a tightly knit, supportive community as romance writers are, there are always people who will focus on those “what-ifs” instead of the “what-nows.” The desire for personal success is a risk of any creative art and it happened to show its stripes at this point.

Okay, back on target with this post…agent pitch went well and I was very happy with the result. As was my family, who had been praying for me all afternoon.

After the pitching experience, I went to the session held by Maisey Yates and Jackie Ashenden about “Protecting Your Joy.” This was the ultimate pep talk for a yes-woman like me who often can’t escape that niggling doubt that my publication is a fluke. And I walked out again feeling empowered and ready to come back to my laptop and tackle my writing.

I swear, if this conference has taught me anything, it has taught me that I love writing. I cannot be happy without it in my life, regardless of fame or publication or review ratings. I bring my own baggage to the table, but as Maisey Yates said in the session, “If something doesn’t add to you more than it takes away from you, it’s not worth having it around you.”

Spent a little more time with Carol and Cheryl before I headed off to prepare for the Harlequin authors party. To put it mildly, it was a blast. I was in awe of all the great authors who were there…I mean, it couldn’t be real that I was there too. It was my Cinderella moment.

Kelly Jensen and Jenn Burke...
wicked awesome ladies!

My fellow Escape Artist Nicole Flockton introduced me to Kristina Knight, Jenn Burke, and Kelly Jensen. Jenn, Kelly, and I actually ended up migrating to one of the outdoor balconies and talking about our SFR (they just had a 5 book deal picked up by Carina and I cannot wait to read it!), video games, writing process, asshole heroes, strong heroines, magic, demons, fantasy worlds, and everything under the sun. I am so grateful I got to meet them at the party. Talking with them was effortless and I will celebrate every new book release they have.

I came back to my hotel to look over my loot and to pack since I was due to leave the next morning. And, in the spirit of complete honesty, I broke down.

I called my husband and we talked for an hour about what my next steps are as a writer. He let me sob to him about how much this has honed my vision for my future. It was a painful, cathartic release borne of complete overload and I needed it desperately.

After all my experiences in those two days, I learned where my key values lay as a writer. It’s nothing too fancy. I’m not worried about fame or money. While validation would be nice at times, I don’t crave positive reinforcement from others to remind myself that what I’m doing has merit. My characters remind me of that themselves.

Day 4...Bittersweet Symphony

By the time Day 4 dawned (far too late for someone who hadn’t gotten into bed until 2 a.m.), I felt at peace with where this conference had led me. C & C met me at Denny’s where I was too tired and nauseous to eat much, but we enjoyed the quiet and time we had to decompress. We hit up three last book signings (one was for the Harlequin 5^th Avenue series and was awesome) and headed to the last two sessions. I went to “Practical Self-Defense for Writers and Their Characters,” led by K.M. Fawcett, Cathy Tully, and Rayna Vause. The women running it were not only hilarious, they ran the session as a completely interactive experience. We gave them scenarios and they talked us through it, demonstrating the moves as they went. They even read over one of my paragraphs from The Wastes and were able to give me feedback on it to ensure it read smoothly and accurately. The session definitely inspired me to get those scenes right when I’m putting them on the page, but also to take a self-defense course in my life because of how unfrightening they made it.

C & C & I met up for my last session of the day; we wanted to take one together and were all interested in this one. That’s how we ended up sitting in “How to Write Hot Sex” with Christine d’Abo, Delphine Dryden, Kate Douglas, and Shoshanna Evers. Exhaustion was creeping in, but I took a lot of notes and will be able to listen to the recordings later and take it in. It was a hilarious, honest panel and gave me some good advice about what to look for when revising those scenes.

Sadly, after that session ended, it was time to head to the airport. I wished Carol goodbye and was heading down to the lobby to meet Cheryl (who kindly offered to drive me to the airport) when I met Maisey Yates’s mother in the elevator. It was funny since I didn’t know who she was, but it was a pleasure to talk with her about the conference and share how much I enjoyed her daughter’s session. And like that, the conference was over.

Cheryl and I hugged at the airport and I headed in to begin my great northward migration. Even now, I’m typing this at my gate while waiting to head home, although I know I won’t post it until I get some good sleep.

Sooooooo…

Final Thoughts

Conference = life changing. Both on a personal level and luggage level (I ended up with over 25 pounds of books to bring home…eek!).

Le loot

The time I’ve spent here is precious.

So, dear readers (and dearest readers, if you’ve stuck around to the end of this post), here is my solemn promise to you.

I will hone my craft to improve with each book. More importantly, I will not write from a place of fear. I will put myself out there and give you the most honest book I can produce.

Thank you for helping me to achieve my dream. I will never take that for granted. Much love to you all!

Guest Author: Stefanie London

I was fortunate to meet Stefanie through the Harlequin forums and was not at all surprised when she landed a contract with the Harlequin KISS line. This lady knows how to write! Her debut novel Only the Brave Try Ballet is fantastic and I'm pleased as punch that she was able to stop by and share a bit about what being a writer means to her.

I've always wanted to be a writer. It sounds so cliche, but it's true! I took as many English subjects in high school as were available, and I crammed a for English Lit subjects into my Bachelor of Business. I claim this was a move to protect my sanity from the accounting and economic subjects that were part of the core curriculum.

Writing a book is no easy task. It takes hours and hours of work, it eats into your social life and it keeps you awake into the wee hours of the morning. But writers have this drive that surpasses the need to keep a clean house or the need to get adequate sleep. 

Here are five signs that you've got a writer's mind:

1. You constantly think 'what if'...' and follow the thread of thought until a scenario builds in your mind

2. You lay awake at night thinking about imaginary things

3. You listen in to conversations on the train/in the office kitchen/at cafes and make up histories for the people talking

4. You hear voices (and they don't tell you to kill people...or maybe they do?)

5. You get invested in characters (whether they're from TV, movies, books etc) and you wonder about them past the conclusion of the series/show/book. 

If you've always wanted to write, if you've wondered why you imagine strange things, if you love telling stories then put pen to paper or fingers to keyboard. You never know where it might take you.

Only The Brave Try Ballet:

Step up, Grant Farley…not your typical ballet student!

Football pro Grant Farley is nursing an injury and needs to get back into shape—fast. Ballet wouldn’t be his first or even his last choice, but he’s desperate. Enter tantalizingly prim teacher Jasmine Bell—one disapproving arch of her eyebrow and Grant knows he’ll enjoy getting her tutu in a flutter!

But it’s not only Grant’s flexibility that Jasmine’s pushing to the limit! He knows she feels the heat between them, so why won’t she give in to it? Time to convince Jasmine that if she’s brave enough to dance en pointe she can certainly handle a fling with him!

Purchase from: Amazon (US | UK | CA | Aus), Harlequin Mills & Boon (US | UK | Aus)

Excerpt:

‘Once more from the top.’

As the music started he followed her lead, bending with his feet in first position. The teacher in her couldn’t ignore the fault of his technique, as he bent his hips moved out of alignment and his feet rolled inwards. She instinctively reached out to correct the error but retracted her hand when her brain kicked into gear.

‘I don’t bite.’

His wolfish grin seemed at odds with the promise of safety, but Jasmine wasn’t going to let some arrogant joker mess with her head. Shewas the teacher; she was the one in charge here.

‘You need to keep your hips steady.’ She stepped forward and placed a hand on each hip. His muscles were tight and flame-hot beneath her palms. He bent down into plié once more and she guided him, ignoring the frisson of electricity that shot through her.

‘Make sure your core is pulled in. It will increase balance and stop you rocking forward.’

‘Like this?’ He grabbed her hand and placed her palm against his stomach. She could feel the ripple of each muscle through his T-shirt. His sports tights moulded every curve of his muscle, every bulge…

Jasmine gulped, her blood pounding as though she’d run a marathon. Get it together.

‘Yes, like that.’ She withdrew her hand, the heat of him still burning her fingertips.

She was going to strangle Elise, her soon to be former best friend, for roping her into this disaster waiting to happen. She was going to—

‘Earth to Bun-Head.’ Grant waved a hand in front of her face, chuckling when she returned her focus to him. ‘I don’t see how this is helping my hamstring. Shouldn’t we be stretching or something? We need to speed up this flexibility thing. I’ve got an important game coming up.’

He shook his leg and rubbed at the muscle.

‘Flexibility is a slow process. You can’t turn up to one ballet lesson and expect to be a contortionist. It takes time.’

‘I’d settle for being injury-free,’ he replied. ‘But if you want to show me how you can put your ankles behind your head then be my guest.’

‘This is not Cirque du Soleil.’ Jasmine bit each word out through gritted teeth.

Stefanie London

Sparkling, contemporary romances with a pinch of spice

ONLY THE BRAVE TRY BALLET (Harlequin KISS) - now available

| Website | Twitter | Good Reads | Facebook |

The Power of Touch

I just wrote a scene in The Wastes where the hero and heroine have to make a difficult good-bye. My inner debate began when I had to decide how they'd each say goodbye to her as she left on a mission she may not come back from. And that led me to thinking about just how important those non-sexual touches can be, especially in a romance.

The value of contact can't be ignored, especially in tense emotional scenes. As Mad Dog, Jenks, Tane, and James make their goodbyes to Talia, each uses a different form of physical contact to get their point across. Cade, on the other hand, avoids that contact.

It's not just an arbitrary choice for me. I realize that some writers may choose to have this be the big moment when he makes a passionate overture or does something that will leave her memory lingering on his touch as she disappears into the night. But I believe that sometimes there is more power in restraint.

One of my all time favorite films is M. Night Shyamalan's The Village. One of the most beautiful and heartbreaking parts of the film is the attention drawn to touch, even the most platonic kind. Both Edward Walker and Lucius Hunt channel immense restraint to not touch those they love.

In Edward's case, it's an admirable decision since he is happily married and unwilling to risk the temptation which could be caused by touching another woman he cares for deeply.

Lucius fights his feelings for Ivy for the first half of the film. The moment when their hands meet is one of the most emotional scenes from the entire film and I get goosebumps every time I watch it.

If you want to see a lovely, gentle romance play out on screen, watch this movie. Forget the suspense, forget the plot twists, watch it for the romance alone.

I hope that I can do Cade's emotions justice through use of this kind of restraint. I have to try.

Vlogging

I can't lie, I prefer to be an introverted tech dinosaur. But I love books and talking about them, so the concept of a vlog is kind of appealing in that sense. As a result, here's my first attempt. Feel free to ask questions, make suggestions for books to mention in the next one, etc.

Mending the Shroud Cover Reveal!

The exciting sequel to Tearing the Shroud is coming July 1, 2014 and here's the cover! Once again Escape Publishing did an amazing job on the artwork and tying the two books together visually. JM is hard at work on the third book, so keep a lookout for it.

When you’ve learned to take possession in stride, love should be easy. Right? It might be if your life and the lives of people you loved weren’t threatened by an invasion of monsters.

Vincent thought saving the world once was a challenge, he didn’t figure on retribution putting a price on his head. It means college takes a back seat again as he’s possessed by Coleman to fight a new battle with the Kafla. But this time he’s not alone, Jule, the woman he loves is also is possessed.

Together they hope to stave off the invasion and take the fight to the Realm, where only a supreme sacrifice can Mend the Shroud and save their worlds.

About the Author

J.M. Bray lives in Southern California with his college sweetheart and their two dogs. After a lifetime together, they are happier than the moment they met. 
When not writing or working his "day job", he loves to cook, play the guitar, and travel with his wife. Every chance he gets, he races an old Porsche named "Tuffy" at tracks in the southwest.

 Buy book one, Tearing the Shroud 

Twitter: @jmbraybooks

Email: jmbray@jmbray.com

Website: www.jmbray.com

Blog: http://blog.jmbray.com

Facebook Author Page: https://www.facebook.com/JMBray.books

Pinterest: http://www.pinterest.com/jmbraybooks/

Fear

This post isn't really for you. It's here to keep me honest when I look back in five years. But if you can help keep me honest, I welcome your reading it.

I will readily admit that the majority of the time, Twitter is a time suck. I've only recently discovered it and the flood of information that comes through it is both disconcerting and lovely due to its sheer volume. I mostly follow writerly friends (authors, readers, publishers, and others of our ilk), but have given in to get the occasional celebrity update as well. I guess I like realizing that they're normal people too.

Now, you may be wondering how this little fact relates in any way to the title of this blog post. Well, here's why:

As hard as it is, I'd like you to ignore the beautiful man (thank you, +Ian Somerhalder) holding the sign and instead focus on what that second sign says.

What would you do if you weren't afraid?

Most of us can instantly think of something flippant and funny and intelligent...you know, something that would catch another person's attention, lead him to see our rapier wit while still showing our slightly vulnerable side, and let us move on with our lives.

That didn't happen to me.

Maybe it's just the right question at the right time, but seeing that second sign left me with a strange tight feeling in my chest because I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt what I would do if I weren't so afraid.

My life is full of uncertainty right now.

My job - the one that doesn't involve my writing - is becoming increasingly difficult to navigate due to massive changes beyond my control. I cannot stress enough that I adore my career, but every day I see the profession being forced further and further away from its true goal.

I sent in a partial manuscript to an incredible editor that I never dreamed I'd ever be able to possibly write for.

I'm working on several stories at once, which I haven't done before, and I need them all to be good.

I am willing to admit that I'm a chronic worrier and someone who is always so surprised by success that I don't ever seem to believe it's truly repeatable, but when I saw that question on Ian Somerhalder's picture, something inside just seemed to click into place. Then I started reading the Twitter comments (again, something I never, ever do on celebrity messages) and was struck by the fact that no one really answered the question.

So I did.

It was stupid. No one will ever read my message, no one will care, but that damn question was its own challenge to me.

Worse, I answered honestly. I answered on a gut reaction, one of those horrendously primal urges that makes you type something and hit enter before you can take it back. (And, for the record, yes, I wish I could take it back.)

And the second I saw my comment posted, all I could think was, "Finally, a little bit of honesty with yourself."

The truth is that at this moment of my life, I'm terrified. It's not paralyzing, it's not crippling. It's a slow-spreading poison that eats out your heart and soul and I'm beginning to wonder if maybe I can stop its destruction by talking honestly about my fears for the first time in far too long.

So here we go...

My Top 3 Fears

Fear #1 - My writing successes are flukes.

 

I have been beyond fortunate in terms of my writing. I am blessed to have been published and every day I remember that.

I still have nightmares that it's not real.

Actual nightmares. The kind where I wake up my husband and he mumbles something kind and curls back up around me to try to put me back to sleep.

Part of it is the competitive side of writing. Every time I hear about someone who's signed with an agent, sold another book, inked an audiobook deal, or gained another five hundred fans on Facebook, I worry that those things haven't happened to me because A) I haven't tried hard enough (my default answer to everything), or B) my writing sucks.

The other part of it is that I don't think I've figured out what I consider "success" is in terms of writing. It's something I need to work on and I need to do that without giving in to the pressure placed on me by outside sources. (I'm talking to you Twitter and Facebook ads declaring that in six weeks I can become the next Stephanie Meyer or EL James!)

Fear #2 - I will never learn to love that nerdy, slightly abrupt, learning-to-be-confident girl I was in high school.

My mother is the perfect example of a woman who is outrageously talented, but never recognizes it in herself. My father and sisters are the same way, my grandmothers, aunts, uncles, cousins, and pretty much everyone I've ever been around my entire life.

They are talented, humble, and incredible.

In high school I was the abrasive girl who never dumbed herself down and had a small corps of friends who could stand me. In college I was dubbed "The Ice Queen" by others in my dorm because I stayed in my room to study and wasn't interested in anything but getting in, out, and on with my life.

Yeah, I'm that girl.

I've never been comfortable when complimented (a trait that my husband claims made my wooing much harder than it should have been). I turn funny colors and get tongue-tied.

I get so afraid of what people will say when they learn that I'm a total nerd that I try to avoid social situations. Now that I'm a writer (which is something I've dreamed of being my entire life...just ask my family and they'll confirm that statement) and am finally getting brave enough to mention that to others, that anxiety is even worse.

I know a lot of people think I'm rude because I don't open up immediately.

I don't mutually follow everyone on Twitter. I don't share all the Facebook promo posts that I probably should. I don't do everything those articles about how to become a popular writer tell you to do. I don't tell everyone how much I love them or beg for confirmations of my greatness. I don't gush.

Basically, I'm still that same uncomfortable, socially awkward girl I was in high school. I'm just older now.

I should love that girl because if I hadn't been her, I'd never be here. I'd never have developed the drive I have now, I'd never have decided that failure simply wasn't an option, and I'd never have found a way to respect myself, even if I do have moments when I pray I'll become someone - anyone - else.

Someday that girl deserves to know that I'm grateful to her for all she helped me become.

Fear #3 - I will let my husband down.

My husband and I will have been together for 10 years this July (married for 6 of those years). He's my rock. For every moment of my flailing, he remains the steady hand that keeps me on track. He reads all my stories before I send them to anyone else. He reminds me to trust myself.

He imagines me in the best light possible and reminds me of that every day, even when I don't deserve it.

I'm terrified that I won't be able to provide him that same support. I don't want to become so focused on myself and what I want to try to accomplish that I overlook his dreams.

Don't get me wrong, I seriously doubt this will happen. We are on the same page about so much and we talk - genuinely talk - to each other every day. We're like 3D glasses...together we blend into something magical.

That was beyond cheesy, but it's true.

Even though I know I will never let myself let him down, I still fear that someday I will. It keeps me motivated to not take him for granted.


So...if you've survived this massive post, there you have it. My three greatest fears. These are the fears that I find so debilitating.

And, to answer Mr. Somerhalder's question, here are...

Things I Would Do If I Weren't So Afraid

1. Pull out the screenplay I wrote in college and rework it.
This is the story that made me want to become a writer for reals. I love it. It's dark and twisted and about love and demons and faith. Actual demons, not metaphorical. I've only shown it in its entirety to two people (my husband and my screenwriting professor). I think it could be something great, but it would hurt so badly to find out that it's useless.

2. Query agents.
Once again, I've only started trying to take myself seriously as a writer. The concept of asking an agent to judge me and determine if I'm a sound investment is one of the most frightening things I can imagine.

3. Be comfortable singing in public.
I sing. I like it. It makes me happy. I've sung on stage before, but I always shake and forget to lose myself in the music. I want to be able to lose myself in the music.

My Writing Process blog hop

One of the most incredible things that comes from being an author is the opportunity to meet other artists who have just as much passion for the craft as you. I've been particularly blessed in getting to know both Escape Artists and writers through the Harlequin forums; we often talk about our writing process, so when the opportunity was presented for me to participate in an international blog hop discussing that topic, I jumped at the chance.




My fellow Escape Artist Ros Baxter (who writes incredibly funny and sexy stories) is the one who got me involved, so stop by and say hi to her if you get a chance.

Now, on to the questions!

Now available from Escape Publishing

What am I working on?

I've definitely got my thumb in a lot of pies right now. I'm currently going through edits on my paranormal romance Blood Moon (releasing this summer with Escape Publishing), the sequel to Red Moon. I'm prepping another story tentatively titled Melting the Ice Queen for submission to Mills & Boon's Modern Tempted line after winning 2nd place in their #TemptedToWrite competition. My untitled SFR prequel to Lace & Lead  is waist-deep in the drafting stage and I'm polishing an older manuscript called A Muse of Fire in preparation for the RWA conference in San Antonio this July. So...busy, busy, busy.

How does my work differ from others of its genre?

I wish I had some intelligent, artsy answer to this one, but all I can honestly say is this: I love to torture my characters. I'm not positive if I should be proud of that and this little quirk drives my husband nuts; he's been begging me to write one, just one story where my characters are happy and have nice lives. But I'm a character-driven writer and I always come back to motivations. If a character is some super-alpha male, there must be some bad ass reason for that. It's all about balance, and the steeper the character arc, the more I demand that my characters have gone through hell to make it out the other side.

Why do I write what I do?

I write because I can't not write. Growing up, I was the kid who had imaginary friends until I was 13. Then I only had imaginary friends in private because it was too embarrassing otherwise. I know a lot of other writers say it, but I actually hear voices in my head...not beautiful prose, but loud, jarring dialogue. It's like having a TV implanted in your brain and you're constantly scanning the channels so you only pick up on little snippets here and there. Sometimes those snippets catch your attention and boom! you have a story.

That's why I really don't have one genre I stick to. According to all sorts of articles, this is the cardinal sin of an author, but I don't really care. Again, I write for the characters and if they're werewolves, gamer nerds, or Regency-era dukes, so be it.

How does your writing process work?

Kind of like vomiting. Gross image, yes, but accurate. Sometimes it's slow and I know its coming. Other times it's spontaneous and I'm left scrambling to contain it before I lose it completely. Regardless, it leaves me with random notes stuck all over everything, a cork board full of pictures of beautiful men (go Luke Evans and Collin Farrell!), and a Pinterest board that has the same pull seen exhibited by black holes. I wouldn't trade it for anything.


So there you go...now you know some of my deep, dark secrets. And even better, next week you can learn about the writing processes of three of my friends: Jan Meredith, Sarah Belle, and Sarah Daltry.

Next Week:

Jan Meredith - Jan Meredith is a wife, mother, nurse, and published author with Entangled Publishing's Flaunt line. Her first novella Playing Doctor was released in November.

Sarah Belle - Sarah Belle writes 'Romagic Comedy' - romantic comedy with a dash of magic- think Suddenly 30 and Drop Dead Diva. Sarah's debut novel, Hindsight was released via Escape Publishing in 2013 and her second, Deja Vu Lou will be released later this year. She's also the mum of four young boys - hence the need for a magical escape at times!

Sarah Daltry - Sarah Daltry writes about the regular people who populate our lives; the principle behind all her stories is that human beings are most interesting in the ways they interact with others. Sarah has spent most of her life in school, from her BA and MA in English and writing to teaching both at the high school and college level. She also loves studying art history and really anything because learning is fun. When Sarah isn't writing (see her website for a full list of titles), she tends to waste a lot of time checking Facebook for pictures of cats, shooting virtual zombies, and simply staring out the window.

#TemptedToWrite

A few weeks ago, Mills & Boon (the UK Harlequin) announced through Twitter that it was throwing a contest targeting its Modern Tempted line. Here in the USA we know Modern Tempted as KISS, a fun, flirty, contemporary line that's put out a ton of great books. Two of my writing friends have just signed contracts with KISS and I've been looking forward to reading their incredible debuts since they announced the news.

The #TemptedToWrite contest has two parts: a writing preparatory course that runs for ten days and the actual contest. The writing prep is the real reason I decided to participate. Over the course of ten business days, Mills & Boon will ask questions designed to help you understand your characters, their motivations, plot points, and other aspects of writing that are targeted toward the Modern Tempted/KISS line. Each day participants can post excerpts of their story in answer to the given question to a Facebook page. A panel of judges (made up of editors and M&B authors) pick their favorite entries and provide feedback and prizes; a top blogger also goes through and picks her favorite answer of the day, comparing it to elements found in Modern Tempted/KISS books, and also offering some awesome prizes. Basically, it's one of those rare opportunities to receive feedback from professionals who can help you learn how to make your writing even better. And since I know very little about the line other than the fact that I like the stories, I thought it would be worth it.

I have been surprisingly successful so far, with two of my answers being picked as winners (one from each set of judges), but more importantly, I've been able to view others' work and takes on the same themes. I've been able to examine other winners' answers and break down why their answer was so successful. It's an incredible opportunity and despite all the other work and stress I'm dealing with, it's been worth every moment.

I think the best thing I'm getting from this experience though is a sense of hope. My stories have always been outside the box - a mixture of genres, heroes a little too dark, new takes on old ideas. It's how I've always written and since I started taking myself and my craft more seriously, it's only become more obvious. I've never allowed myself to dream that I'd be able to write for a publisher's line...it just didn't seem to be in my cards. But this story is coming together and getting good reviews from people who are really knowledgeable, so there's got to be some hope.

So here's the real challenge...the contest portion of #TemptedToWrite limits you to 10,000 words and I think my story is going to be over that. I have no idea what's going to happen with it at this point, but I know I've got to finish writing it. If I can cut it down and have it still make sense, I'll enter in the contest. If I can't (deep breath here) I'm going to query Harlequin KISS and see if they're at all interested. It could easily be a rejection, which would sting, but I think I have to try it.

I'm absolutely terrified, but maybe that's the point of this whole thing. Terror means I'm taking a risk. And taking a risk as a writer means growth. A painful, but inevitable, pattern if you intend to survive as a species.

First Lines: Jennie Jones

Today's visitor is my soul-sister from Australia!

Jennie Jones

Jennie Jones is hard at work on The House at the Bottom of the Hill, a sequel to her Escape Publishing hit The House on Burra Burra Lane. I can't wait to read the next book about Swallow's Fall!







Jennie's favorite first lines comes from Sara Donati's Tied to the Tracks:

"Summer in Georgia, sweet and ripe and heavy with heat at a quarter to nine in the morning."

Always one to look under the surface, Jennie's reasoning for this line:

Well, I know from the back cover blurb that this is going to be a modern, grown-up love story and the first line puts me instantly into the ambiance and mood of the setting. It’s a slow morning; there’s a heat wave and everything about this place is welcomed and loved. What can happen to disturb this?

Keep up with Jennie's releases:
Author webpage
Facebook
Twitter
Goodreads

Learn more about the plans for Swallow's Fall:

I’m working on a follow up to my debut novel The House on Burra Burra Lane. Book #2 in my rural/country-town series is entitled The House at the Bottom of the Hill and introduces two new characters as the heroine and hero. We renew acquaintance with some of the Swallow’s Fall townspeople from book #1 and discover a few new and slightly eccentric members of newly formed town committee who are about to give the heroine and hero a number of problems they didn’t foresee.